It has been a long day, O Grand and Mighty Shovel. The Large-Jawed Woman got "gussied up", as she called it, and went out to "bag some guy".

Minionwannabe Bruce is still in sunny Puerto Vallarta, and Esteban's pool is developing a slightly greenish cast with a sheen of fungus (it's delicious, so I'm not complaining).

And now that she's gone, and Elderly Boyfriend has returned to his shop, I am alone at last.

Your faithful minion,

Illuminati